Anger Management

Is your anger creating problems in your life?

Are you frequently arguing with family, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances?

Are you concerned at how irritable and quick to anger you are… even at the smallest things?

Maybe you lash out… and then immediately feel bad about how you reacted?

Are you displaying physical violence or threats… such as slamming doors or shoving another person?

Maybe you’ve even had issues with the law because of your anger?

Physically, you may notice tension in your neck and shoulders; or your jaw is clenched, and your face feels tight. Maybe your chest or stomach feels tight as well.

Emotionally, you are on edge. You find almost everyone and everything irritating. You just can’t be happy. You try not to snap at those around you, but sometimes you can’t help it. You’re tense and feel like you want to crawl out of your skin.

Anger is a natural human emotion, so we all know what it feels like. But, if you’re reading this, chances are you often feel as though you need to “push down” or “hold in” that feeling.

There are external and internal reasons for this anger.

Maybe you’ve been bullied, lost property, or been lied to. Maybe you got angry when someone cut you off on the road, or your favorite baseball player got hurt and is out for the year.

Maybe you’ve perceived injustice or experienced failure or some other frustration. Maybe a law was recently passed that you feel is unfair. Maybe you failed a physical that is required for a job promotion.

Chris’s* anger was affecting his happiness, relationships, work, and health.

Chris is 42 and has a problem with anger. Here’s how he described his morning…

I went downstairs for breakfast, and there were no clean bowls. My spouse knows I eat oatmeal every morning. What the hell? I have to do everything in this damn house.

I noticed my son’s lunch was packed for school, so I guess no one gives a crap about me. I felt my irritation rising. My son asked for a ride to school. I berated him for being irresponsible and told him to walk. He looked hurt and left. I felt terrible for what I said to him, but in the moment, I was furious.

On my drive into work, the person in front of me stopped for a yellow light. We could have both easily made it through the light. I thought I was going to have a stroke. I laid on my horn for most of the red light so that he knew what an idiot he was.

Here’s how therapy helped Chris…

Impulse control (reacting to his son)

Are you struggling with reactivity like this? Is your response more extreme than what the situation really calls for?

I will help you understand what triggers your anger outbursts, so they will happen less frequently. We will explore the early signs of your increasing anger and notice where it is in your body. You will learn relaxation techniques and when and how to walk away from a situation where your anger is escalating. You will have fewer conflicts with others and start to feel calmer in general.

Changing your thoughts (no clean bowls so no one cares about me)

Are you exaggerating the meaning of something or blaming others for your problems?

Distorted thinking patterns can add stress due to misunderstanding or misinterpreting others’ intentions or actions. You’ll learn how to reframe some of these negative thinking patterns, which will eliminate unnecessary stress… leaving you to be more pleasant in the company of others.

Self-exploration (his irritability and anger)

Are you angry but not really sure exactly why?

I will help you identify deeper feelings that you may be pushing away and avoiding. Together, we discover what’s beneath your anger and work to resolve it. You will start feeling lighter again and begin enjoying being around others.

Don’t let your anger be debilitating in your life.

Anger can be destructive to your career, your valued relationships with others, and your mental and physical health. It can cause you to behave in ways that are not true to your character.

Don’t wait for things to get so bad that you have crossed the line, and there is no way to take it back.

Call me today and schedule your first appointment. I also offer a free 15-minute telephone conversation to answer any questions that you may have before getting started: (703) 203-4689.

*Names changed to preserve client confidentiality.